Take The Pressure Off!
Guest Post: Teresa Romain
Take the Pressure Off… “Stay Loose”…
I love to use sports analogies. I think it stems from being involved in sports year-round when I was in school.
No matter what sport it was, each of my coaches kept advising me to…
“Take the pressure off” and “Stay loose”…
Like most athletes, whenever I put too much pressure on myself (to make a basket, to get a hit, to win the match, to run my fastest race), my muscles would tighten up and I’d get tense – then I’d miss an easy shot, throw a bad pass, strike out, make a careless mistake.
The key to performing my best was to “stay loose”… to play the game in a relaxed, focused, clear-headed, energized manner – something that was impossible to do under pressure when I was “attached” to the results. (FYI – Being “attached” is the exact opposite of “staying loose”.)
This same “stay loose” principle applies to building your business and accessing the lasting abundance you desire.
If you look up “pressure” in the dictionary, you will find it is defined as: (1) the state of being pressed or compressed; (2) an oppressive condition of physical, mental, social or economic distress; and (3) to force [something].
I’m sure you’ll agree – NONE of those definitions sound very abundant!
And yet, this state of “pressure” is what you – like many home-based entrepreneurs – might be experiencing all the time, without even realizing it. You might even think it’s “normal” or “necessary”.
But pressure is no more normal or necessary for us than scarcity. In fact, operating under too much pressure actually limits or completely blocks abundance.
As radical as it may seem, I am now of the opinion that ALL of the pressure we experience in our businesses stems from SCARCITY and, especially, from an inaccurate belief that something is “not enough”.
For example, if you aren’t making “enough” phone calls or money in your business, you feel pressure to make more.
If you don’t have a “big enough” organization, you feel pressure to do more until you are “big enough”. (Good luck! Because in that scenario, it won’t matter how big you get, it still won’t be “big enough”!)
If you’re in debt or have a job you hate and think your business is your “ticket out”, you’ll be attached to your having your business grow bigger and faster. More pressure.
If other people expect more of you or doubt your ability, you might feel pressure to prove to them that you can succeed or perform well. Again, you become “attached” to the results instead of “staying loose”.
Through it all, notice you are operating under pressure. A business built under the pressure of scarcity will one day “blow up” (just like a “pressure cooker” kept under pressure for too long), taking with it any illusion of success and abundance you have attained.
Pressure will NEVER support you to access and experience abundance… because abundance is relaxed, flowing, flexible, patient, open and powerful. Abundance is the very essence of “staying loose”.
So – the first step is to notice when and in what areas in your business you are feeling “pressure”. Notice if or how you are thinking that what you are doing is “not enough”. Check to see if that is accurate. Have you defined what “enough” is for you at this point in time?
Are you feeling pressure because you are trying to prove something to someone – including yourself? WHAT are you trying to prove? Name it. And then ask yourself “what does proving that prove?” What you might begin to discover is your need to “prove” comes from an underlying sense of low self-worth or “not enoughness” you feel about yourself. And, trust me on this one – no matter what you do in your business – it’s not going to prove or fix that!
Notice, too, how or if you are feeling “attached” to the results. What would happen if you let go of that and just took the actions you can take, to the best of your ability AT THIS TIME? And get really honest with yourself about what you think it will “mean” or what will happen if you don’t get that result.
If you do, you’ll probably realize that your family and friends will still love you, that the sun will still rise in the east, that there will still be things in your life that you enjoy and have and can be grateful for. Remember – there is truly very little we “need”. Do not confuse really WANTING something with “needing” it – and it will be easier to “stay loose”.
So – having said that – how can you start “playing loose” in your business? How can you “stretch yourself” to grow and be in action without “forcing or pressuring yourself”?
I’d love to hear your ideas… but here are a few “PRACTICE” suggestions I can offer…
1. When you notice yourself feeling tense, tight, pressured… pause for 60 seconds and simply take some long, slow, deep breaths. Be as present as you can be to what is happening in this moment. Just be in the moment. Notice the sounds. Notice the smells. Notice what you’re feeling. Just BE for 60 seconds – and breathe in the oxygen that gives us life.
2. Pressure is often a response to a conscious or subconscious thought you have that you didn’t do “enough” or you’re not making “enough”. In reaction to this pressure, your focus becomes one of trying to do MORE or A LOT – and FAST. (This creates more pressure). If you notice that you’re feeling pressure about having to do it ALL, then give yourself permission to take the pressure off and do ONE thing. Then…
3. CELEBRATE that ONE action! In fact, CELEBRATE each action you take that releases the pressure yet keeps you in the game. (An athlete can drop out of the game because he “can’t stand the pressure” or he can learn how to “play loose” and keep playing. You want to learn the latter.)
Here’s to the “loose” and “relaxed” YOU! Here’s to your growth and your abundance!
Teresa Romain
Teresa Romain is the President & Founder of www.AccessAbundance.com and has trained and coached thousands of individuals around the world access and experience greater freedom, fulfillment, well-being and abundance in their businesses and their lives. Unique in her approach and dynamic and passionate in her style, Teresa is known for making the transformational process of accessing abundance challenging, fun and powerful in its results.
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I can’t describe how much I needed this today. I can feel my blood pressure being higher than normal today due to the pressure I’m putting on myself. No one puts as much pressure on me than I do.
Thanks for this insight Teresa!
Am jsut starting a Leadership Development Course for some in my group…This will be one of the first articles I post for their reading!! SO Well suited for US!! GREAT Reminders..Thank you for giving us all permission to “play loose and RELAX!!”
What a powerful (and unusual) gift you will be giving your group. To actually support them to TAKE THE PRESSURE OFF! That doesn’t mean that they don’t “play the game”… but notice that it’s about PLAYING the game not PUSHING or FORCING the game. I’m so glad you will be sharing this with your group – that makes you an exceptional leader in my book!
Glad this hit the spot today, Bonnie…. does this mean you are now “officially” BREATHING now? 🙂
Seriously… it sounds like you need to define what your “enough” is in your business at this point in time… on this particular day… have it be a goal for actions or results that stretches you but is still realistic given everything else in your life. And have it be a goal that you can accomplish while still having time to BREATHE, oaky?
I know your leaders will appreciate Teresa’s perspective. And way to go for creating something that inspires leaders to not just sell and recruit, but to also look after their own needs. Awesome!
I think that’s more common than we want to admit: putting more pressure on ourselves than anyone else. 🙂 Part of the practice is to become aware of it, and then make changes WITHOUT beating ourselves up for it.
Thanks for sharing today – especially in light of the pressure you’ve been feeling.
I’m in Lisa’s Group and she did an amazing job on our training tonight. I am going to start “Celebrating” every action! The first being…reading the first article posted!! I’m Celebrating!
Hooray Stephanie!!
Celebration has been one of the toughest practices for me. And not just celebrating the results, but the actions. Teresa’s been great at helping me with that. Glad it’s helping you, too!
Sure glad to see that both of you are practicing CELEBRATION! It’s such a FUN “skill” to develop! 🙂
This should help us all — we seem to be so busy that everything overwhelms us at times and we feel so over powered by the things that are on our ‘to do’ list……seems like we can’t ever get it all caught up…….This is some very needed information to use in every day life and especially when you are trying to run a business……….THANKS for your thoughts………..